Relationships  CONTINUED-

Beverly James

Many people who experience our services have been wounded in significant ways throughout their lives.  They are experiencing major "attachment disorders."  Beverly James' book describes how "normal" bonds are formed in typical development. 

James, B. (1994).
Handbook for the treatment of attachment-trauma problems in children. New York: The Free Press.

Available from one of the online outlets such as or or

Charlotte Kasl

From the book jacket: "At once practical, playful, and spiritually sound, this book is about creating a new love story in your life.  Drawing from Christian, Buddhist, Sufi, and other spiritual traditions,
If The Buddha Dated shows how to finad a partner without losing yourself."  A great book for anyone looking for love in all the wrong places.

Kasl, C. (1999).
If the Buddha dated: A handbook for finding love on a spiritual path. New York: Penguin Books. 

Available in many bookstores or from one of the online outlets such as or or

Jeffrey Kauffman

Jeffrey Kauffman's book,
Guidebook on Helping Persons with Mental Retardation Mourn is an excellent resource for anyone who wants to help folks who experience intellectual disabilities to heal from loss. A bit clinical, but not too clinical, the book contains lots of useful information about the process of mourning for someone we love. 

Kauffman, J. (2005). Guidebook on helping persons with mental retardation mourn. Amityville, NY Baywood Publishing Company.

Available from the Baywood Publishing Company web site and

Craig Kennedy and Doug Fisher

As kids get older, it can get tougher to help them to make connections, particularly in the middle and high school years. Craig Kennedy and Doug Fisher provide great ideas for increasing the chance of success in middle school in their book Inclusive Middle Schools. You can order the book from The Peak Parent Center, Inc., 611 N. Weber, Suite 200, Colorado Springs, Colorado 80903.  Call for a catalogue of available publications 1-800-284-0251.  Visit the Peak Parent Center web site by clicking here.

Tom Kohler and Susan Earl

"The beloved community is not a utopia, but a place where the barriers between people gradually come down and where the citizens make a constant effort to address even the most difficult problems of ordinary people.  It is above all else an idealistic community."  So writes Jim Lawson in his introduction to Tom Kohler and Susan Earl's "Waddie Welcome and the Beloved Community."  A fabulous work that can ignite hope in the saddest of hearts.  Go online and purchase your copy today at

Kohler, T. & Earl, S. (2005). 
Waddie Welcome and the beloved community.  Toronto: Inclusion Press

James J. Lynch

A fascinating description of what happens to our bodies in the
presence of and absence of  meaningful relationships.  As W. Horsley Gantt, M.D. of The John Hopkins Medical School writes, "Dr. Lynch brings together striking evidence that companionship is an important life force."

Lynch, J.J. (1977).
The broken heart: The medical consequences of loneliness.  New York: Basic Books, Incorporated.

John McKnight

For nearly three decades, John McKnight has conducted research on social service delivery systems, health policy, community organizations, neighborhood policy, and institutional racism.  He currently directs research projects focused on asset-based neighborhood development and methods of community building by incorporating marginalized people (description from  the Institute on Policy Research of Northwestern University web site).  Click here for additional information about John McKnight and his work).

McKnight, J. (1995).
The careless society: Community and its counterfeits.  New York: Basic Books.

Kretzmann, J.P. & McKnight, J. (1993).
Building communities from the inside out: A path toward finding and mobilizing a community's assets. Chicago: ACTA Publications.

Building Communities from the Inside Out is diistributed exclusively by ACTA Publications, 4848 North Clark Street, Chicago, IL 60640. Phone: 800-397-2282.

Gary Messinger and Lisa Mills

Gary Messinger and Lisa Mills, in their wonderful book
Sharing Community! Strategies, Tips, and Lessons Learned from Experiences of Community Building at Options, provide 20 great and surprising tips for community building.  Based on their experiences at Options, a non-profit organization that provides supported living supports in Madison, Wisconsin, this book is must-reading for anyone trying to build community for people who experience disabilities.  Available through the Options Web site. 

Messinger, G. & Mills, L. (2005).
Sharing community! Strategies, tips, and lessons learned from experiences of community building at Options. Madison, WI: Atwood Publishing Company.

John O'Brien, John and Connie Lyle-O'Brien

This is a book about friendships and personal commitment and much, much more.  A must for anyone interested in the work of building rich, welcoming communities.

O'Brien, J. and Lyle-O'Brien, C. (1996).
Members of each other: Building community in company with people with developmental disabilities.  Toronto: Inclusion Press.

Available through the Inclusion Press.

John O'Brien and Beth Mount,

Make a Difference: A Guidebook for Person-Centered Direct Support is an invaluable resource, packed with helpful information and exercises for supporting the development of relationships.  I can't recommend it highly enough.  Available online through the Inclusion Press.

O'Brien, J. & Mount, B. (2005).
Make a difference: A guidebook for person-centered direct supports. Toronto: Inclusion Press.

John O'Donohue

In his book
Eternal Echoes: Celtic Reflections On Our Yearning To Belong, John O'Donohue, a Catholic Scholar, writes beautifully of our "most basic of human desires -- the need to belong, a desire that constantly draws us to new possibilities of self-discovery, friendship, and creativity."  Thanks to Cheryl H. for the recommendation.

O'Donohue, J. (1999).
Eternal echoes: Celtic reflections on our yearning to belong. New York: Haper Collins Publishers.

Available in local bookstores and also from one of the online outlets such as or or